I recently chose a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age.

A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?"

He asked, "Do you smoke tobacco or drink alcoholic beverages?"

"Oh no," I replied. "I don't do drugs, either."

Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks, barbecued ribs, or a lot of Tex-Mex food?"

I said, "No, my other doctor said that consuming lots of red meat and greasy foods is unhealthy!"

"Do you spend a lot of time, out in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, gardening, hiking, or bicycling?"

"No, I don't," I said.

He asked, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or motorcycles, or have a lot of sex?"

"No," I said. "I don't do any of those things."

He looked at me and said, "Then why do you even care?"